Saturday, March 6, 2010

Mean Girls

When I found out I was having a girl; I was thrilled! I wanted a girl so bad I could taste it. I wanted a girl as bad as Dustin wanted a boy. I wanted a girl like fat kids want cake. I dreamt of tea parties and frilly pink socks, big hair bows, and American Girl Dolls. I couldn't be happier that I have a girl.

Now that being said, I realize that there is a lot of responsibility that comes with girls. First you have to instill celibacy values from Day 1. (I once heard a Chris Rock set about his biggest wish to keep his daughter off the pole, seriously, it's true). I worry about creating positive self-esteem, but almost worse than that, I worry about too much positive self-esteem AKA "Mean Girls." What if my daughter is a mean girl? What do I do right this minute to make sure I never hear the words, "you are so not my friend anymore"? It's a big worry.

Just yesterday I overheard these exact words; "I'm your friend, but literally, everybody else hates you." OUCH! That was a hard hit to the ole self-esteem of one of my kiddos. I can't get it off my mind. Who says that? I think of another couple of people I know, how they are part of the elite, who make some people wonder if they wore a jeans too many times in one week or if they're allowed to sit at the cool table. Mean girls are everywhere, kids, teens, adults, it doesn't matter. So, the question is, how do I shield the sting of a mean girl while simultaneously preventing the growth of one? It's one that will cause many a sleepless night for sure, I'm afraid.

1 comment:

Lisa said...

I know what you mean. I've stressed over similar thoughts. How do I instill my faith in her? How do I make sure she's confident in herself and her abilities, but not full of herself? How do I make sure she is aware of the others around her and has compassion for them? The only answer I've come up with so far is prayer and by exhibiting the behaviors I want her to have.